You're a 1st Marsian Settler

Rxke · 2004-05-27 12:44:41

Journal entry.

Good thing we played 'abandon ship' untill we were bored silly on the way to Mars...
I survived the depressurisation, but my eardrums are gone, I'm afraid, can't hear a thing, so if anyone comes knocking at the door, they're in for a dissapointement...

Had to axe HAL, literally, not only the airlocks kept popping, turns out he's been playing with the 'fridge, too... While he did quite a good job at cooking the frozen stuff, the plastic wrapping have melted in the process, giving everything quite an exotic taste...

Today I saw something weird on the monitors: some kind of hermit, crying like a child... Too bad I couldn't read his lips, his food-caked beard covered his mouth...

While I was outside, repairing the airlocks, there was this weird meteor-storm, so I had to jump for cover. When i came out a while later, to examine those pristine meteoroids, they turned out to be *bricks*
Probably an attempt to kill me by using some sort of catapult, but why go through all the trouble and use bricks, with all those rocks lying around already? Another proof they've lost it.

Palomar · 2004-05-27 13:01:43

Captain's Log: Stardate 2045.3: I've gathered up all my herbs, dried vegetables, bunny wabbits, sundresses, sandals, etc., have packed them into my rover and am making it Splitsville from the loons around me...

(Plan to turn Cobra's bullet molds into Jell-O molds failed...)

Spacesuit and boots are a good fit...thank goodness I've stuck to my cottage cheese and Special K Challenge diet...

If I have to resort to weaponry as I make a break for the Open Country, I will pack love beads into my pea shooter and aim for the whites 'o their eyes...

Made it! Got the pedal to the metal, am peeling out and racing to Dust Devil territory!

Cobra Commander · 2004-05-27 13:23:58

"Journal entry, Thriday. Got back to fortress, air almost gone. Discovered my atmosphere processor system is useless. Stupid robots.
Brick wall still covers main airlock, rabbits didn't clear it like I told them to. Now has graffiti in Rabbish. Or maybe just random scarring from cannon explosion, hard to be certain. So cold. Rabbits have become much better at hiding, haven't eaten in... hard to say, except for soy based meat substitute from rover wreck. Think it was meatloaf. Or perhaps upholstery.
Thought I saw Cindy walking in the desert. Didn't say anything, could have been a robot in disguise. They're everywhere, watching. Rain is constant in the fortress, think I'll raid the hermit's place. Unless the robots are waiting, then hiding in the tunnels may be in the cards. climbing over...Q#R::}_-----

Testing. Ground gave way, fell into lava tube. Dark, rocky, something stabbing into my leg. Taste like fire. Used duct tape to patch suit. Think I'm stuck here for a while, but at least there's no robots."

~Eternal~ · 2004-05-27 14:12:22

1.) Building Geodysenic domes(and learning how to spell Geodysenic) in my free time.

2.) Getting things built via my Phds in Architecture and Engineering.

3.) Tiddling in the greenhouse.

4.) Occasionally throughing clark out of my geodysenic domes :b

Rxke · 2004-05-27 14:35:41

Journal entry, today...

Looks like HAL pulled another trick with the life-support, before I axed him... Checking the athmosphere, it turned out he switched the nitrogen with Helium...

I only discovered this minutes ago, might explain the setback i had in trying to reach CapCom on good ol' Earth... Since the computers are down (duh...) i only had this very old radio transmitter from our lil' museum, but I'm deaf, so again: one-way... Anyhoo... When i started yelling into the mike for help, all glass around me scattered.
Impressive, but depressing. The back-up radio i was using was this vintage glass-tube thing, darn.

Considering seriously to leave this mess. The air is getting thicker by the day, and since I'm a Belgian by birth, I'm used to incessant rain. Food shouldn't be a problem, lately there are hordes of wabbits everywhere you look. Though apparently extremely spooked for some reason, it must be possible to catch some of them. Excercising 'abandon Ship' as much as i can, current record: 3 hours seven minutes...

Cobra Commander · 2004-05-27 14:38:56

"Journal entry, Day of Atonement. Have acquired a copy of forged Cobra manifesto. Suspect it is the product of robot sympathizers on the council seeking to discredit me. No matter, the colonials will pay for their transgressions, the Day of Atonement is upon us. I shall lead the righteous out of the habs and into the promised land. The sands will run red with the blood of the non-believers for the almighty has shown me the way to salvation. Fear not, fellow Martians and large rabbits for you will soon be embraced in the warming fires of salvation.

May have to revise plan, seem to have misplaced stone tablets given to me by the Almighty. Walked for days through the lava tube enduring visions for nothing. Crap. "

clark · 2004-05-27 14:49:13

Journal entry, days no longer have meaning on this planet.

The Beligum is screaming on the radio again. I stopped listening, the power on the radio broadcast won't get very far, and I've given up trying to tell him. I think he is deaf.

I searched the hermits hab, and found a few useful supplies. Yet I'm concerned, the reactor rods are gone. If those things fall into the wrong hands, which at this point, is just about anyone on the ground, there might be some pretty big fireworks.

Oh yeah, found some stone tablets with strange symbols and gibberish on them. I sanded it clean, and drew a figure of a golden calf on it. I sure do miss my golden calfs... and my plumbing!

Cobra Commander · 2004-05-27 14:56:56

"Journal entry, Night of Wandering. Found way out of lava tube, headed back to hab. Stopped on the way for a game of chess against against Castro and a rabbit-man. Quit when I yelled at them for having two Queens. Found west wall of fortress crumbling, uncertain as to cause. Golden calves laughed at me for losing the stone tablets, so I shot them. Aside from Fidel, haven't seen another human being in... some time. Thought I heard a garbled radio transmission in helmet speakers, but sounded like breaking glass. Probably hallucinating. Annoying since at the time the rabbit king was trying to tell me something. Also heard something about new supply ships and something called the Yu-Knighted-Nations. Digging in invasion, the rabbits will fight as well. Also, Jebus is on our side, he told me so but is still upset about losing the tablets. May not be able to leave entry for a while, much to do. Must fix robots and train them in swordsmanship to fight the Yu Knights. If they betray me I will crush them. "

Palomar · 2004-05-27 15:03:47

What's this?

A hitchhiker? On Mars? Out here, in the middle of nowhere? :-\

I pull over. Open rover door.

"Going my way, toots?" He asks.

:-\

Well...I'll take my chances. Can't leave him to starve/die of thirst out here. So long as he doesn't get too fresh.

Door closes. Helmet off, now I can see his face.

Oh, it's...

...http://www.space-debris.com/st_shatner_TVbridge.jpg]just too good to be true

--Cindy :laugh:

clark · 2004-05-27 15:08:35

Journal entry,

I've been watching Cobra, to see if he has the reactor rods. I don't quite understand what he is doing, but he seems to be lining up a bunch of dead bunnies in marching formation. I feel I should tell him that they can't survive exposed to the Martian air, but he is always carrying that damn rifle. Still trying to figure out why he swings it like a samurai sword instead of just pointing and shooting.

Also, found a dead vulcan.

Cobra Commander · 2004-05-27 15:10:31

Time is but a fabrication of the frail human mind, unable to grasp the nuance of true reality. I have come to believe that this Earth-place the records speak of is but a fantasy created by slick marketing types and communalists. If such a place existed, why would anyone come here, I ask you? The rabbit king has taken to speaking in Belgian through the radio. His true words appear in my mind. His voice sounds purple.
I saw Cindy in the desert today, she pelted me with a hail of strange colored beads. She was with some guy, he looked familiar but I can't place it. They drove away saying something about 'sand people.' The beads landed in the form of an arrow. I have taken this as a sign and am following. Found a supply cache, so I took everything. Don't know why anyone would leave perfectly good airtanks and food out here. Maybe it was Jebus, Fidel says he put it there but I don't believe him. Leg still sore, maybe I should change the duct tape. Still no sign of ships, beginning to think Jebus made up that Yu Knight crap.

Rxke · 2004-05-27 15:10:34

Journal entry. Day one.
Finally did it! If i don't exert myself too much, i am able to breathe withoute a mask! I'm free!
*pause*
Ugh... must've passed out, again. Better get used to that...
Not sure how long these notes will stay readable, scribbled on wabbit-hide, rain doesn't help much either...

I -slowly- climbed up to the hill close to the base-camp, to keep an eye on things. No-one'll come looking for me, i think.
*pause*
Ugh... Where was i... oh yes, i gutted the base of some neccessities, it's a bare shell, now after everybody having left, and...
Hey! What's that? A ship landing! With the UN flag on it! We're saved!
*passes out*
Ugh... better stay low. Got conscious again, just in time to see them emerge, and head into the base. Needless to say, minutes later they scrambled out again, what with the stench of burned plastic, malfunctioning toilets etc.
They look pretty angry, and i'm not sure, but if i turn up the magnification of my binoculars, the insignia on their suits are MILITARY!
Uh-oh....

Cobra Commander · 2004-05-27 15:21:15

Found some strange glowing sticks. Spirits tell me they are rods of power, but I don't remember what they are for. Carrying them in pocket for warmth. Finally saw a Yu Knight, not impressed. He was more scared of me than I of him. I took his air and water. He was talking too himself the whole time, calling for help. Like Jebus is gonna turn on me... Fidel maybe.
Went back to the old settlement. What a dump, those people are crazy. Don't know where they all went, maybe underground. Or Yu Knights may have got them, they always had problems with weapons. Intact plumbing seems to support this conclusion. Going into tunnels now, ship moving in the distance. Or flying elephant, hard to tell. Wish rabbit king was here.

clark · 2004-05-27 15:29:40

It was too late by the time I got there, the UN astronaut was already dead. He looked French, so I'm pretty sure I know who did this. There was no time for a burial, so I stripped the body and took the suit- not a bad fit.

I think I saw someone running around without a mask, still not sure how that is possible. Maybe the isolation and radiation is really starting to get to me.

I'm hoping I can reach the rest of the UN team before anyone else does. A dead vulcan, and a dead UN astronaut, this can mean only one thing...

Rxke · 2004-05-27 15:47:50

What a day...
The UN troops are everywhere, looking for us... Then all of a sudden they scrambled to their rover, and drove to the north, like in some panic...
Few minutes later C.C. appeared, from the south, he looks a mess. Funny thing is, the moment C.C. appeared, my Geiger-counter started flashin wildly, maybe that's why everybody fled...
C.C. entered the base, and emerged some time later with the last remaining plumbing, the bastard. I was nearly finished to install the new ones after he robbed the old ones...
What am i talking about? I have no use for the base anymore, so he can have them.

After C.C. left, i climbed down (i fell, actually, still dizzy spells...) to have a closer look at the dark fluid that apparently oozed out of C.C.'s suit. Looks like blood...

That's when I saw Clark, so i run away as fast as i could. He probably saw me, I'm in bad shape, still wheezing after the exertion....

Cobra Commander · 2004-05-27 19:31:59

Thanked Jebus for the coming of the blue-helmeted Yu Knights, whose arrival has brought a treasure of air, food and ammunition. Approached with the last of my rifles. They surrendered, so I took as much loot as I could carry. A few keep following me. They're obnoxious, but seem harmless. Still, I think I'll have to lose them soon. Or maybe not, haven't seen any rabbits for awhile.
I think I remember what those glowing rods were for, thanks to diagram in Yu Knight notebook. Somehow the grey putty-like substance plays a role, not thinking clearly, can't recall. Also, a strange blistered rash has appeared on my leg, but the bleeding has stopped.
Thought I saw Rxke in the old colony, or another robot, can't be sure. It had no mask on, so probably a robot. Built a monument to Jebus from plumbing supplies. He's still angry about the missing stone tablets. I told him that guy that left with Cindy took them, but Jebus says he was a cop. Adam or something, wasn't listening. He's getting awfully preachy.
May have to go into hiding for awhile, need to figure out how to use these glowing rods.
Yu Knights taste like rabbit.

Palomar · 2004-05-27 19:43:47

Capt. Kirk and I drive on, discussing everything from vintage Saurian brandy to what I've named the rabbits.

"You mean -we-; what -we've- named the rabbits."

"We?" He asks.

"My husband and I."

He blinks. Smiles unbelievingly. "No."

Slip my left hand out of my glove, show the golden band.

He sighs, sadly. "Cindy, you're the first woman in the galaxy who ever broke my heart. Honestly."

(Yeah, right...some guys really WILL say anything...<ahem>)

Twenty minutes later my husband catches up on Marsian motorcycle. We stop. He's not happy about Capt. Kirk. We talk, I explain.

"It's time for me to be getting back to the ship anyway." Kirk says diplomatically. "But before I go, I'd like to kiss your wife's hand. The hand which rescued me from the wilderness of Mars, and drove me back to the landing party site."

Husband nods. I extend my hand, which Kirk kisses like a gentleman.

Spock shows up out of nowhere.

"We thought you were dead." Kirk says mischievously.

??? "Incorrect, Captain. As I attempted to subject a crazed individual to the Vulcan Neck Pinch, Sol got into my eyes -- I accidentally pinched my own neck, thereby rendering myself unconscious. I'm okay now."

We all laugh.

They get beamed back up, husband and I drive off into the Solset.

--Cindy

Mundaka · 2004-05-27 21:17:26

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Dear Mom and Dad, I know its been some time since I've radioed an email, but things have been really hectic around here. You know the saying, "Hell hath no wrath like a woman scorned"? Well, I don't know for women, but apparently Clark really didn't like it when I told him I wasn't interested in black leather and lace, and now he's gone crazy! First he found a way into that underground radiation proof tunnel we dug -- the one where I kept my rabbits? Then he stole my rabbits and tore out all my plumbing (talk about a mess! He filled the place with raw sewage!) Took my cinnamon too.

Everyone says he tried to blame it all on Cobra -- yeah right, except for a few garbled messages (didn't stick around long enough to see them) CC hasn't been heard from since he set out to build himself a homestead, the way Cindy's hubby and Josh and I did. What is clark trying to do, start another Elvis rumor? It was funny when he started all that stuff about Martian cities -- he tried to blame that on Cobra too -- but now he's messing with our infrastructure. I don't know how clark got all that stuff in the rover, but then he took off with the plumbing, the bricks I was going to use to bribe Rxke and that crazy pagan cow of his.

I had to bring more of my bricks down to Rxke but then he went biserk and started squeeking -- yes, squeeking! He was so mad he sounded like a cartoon character breathing helium -- at me over the radio. Told me he couldn't help, that his keyboard was toast, yeah sure. Anyway I ran into Trebuchet, who was packing for the hills, and asked if I could borrow that catapult he uses to impress underage women. I launched a few bricks at Rxke's place, and got a real surprize when I heard glass breaking. Who would have thought his hab was so fragile? Speaking of Rxke, he wouldn't send any email either, so that's why I'm uploading to you via shortwave.

Cindy, meanwhile lit out for hermit country with all the medical supplies and veggies (fortunately the ones I *don't* like, except for the onions -- why did she have to take them ALL? Cindy hasn't spoken to me since I missed her birthday, btw -- good thing we built our homesteads in different branches of the canyon.) I decided by leaving she had the right idea and split myself, rumor has it Josh is building warrior androids and rail guns again.

I got an idea to try and capture clark though -- can't have somebody who has gone crazy on the loose -- by placeing caches on the path to Cobras place. I figured if he is stealing supplies I can track him by hiding RFID chips in the vitamins. Seems to have worked, but better than I expected: One seems to have made its way into the hilltops to the east of Josh's place, the other went towards the large mountain overlooking Cobras homestead. An hour ago there was a huge explosion on the mountain, and now the RFID chip seems to be broken -- no signal. Which one was clark I don't know. One thing is for sure -- somebody had a fight out here: smashed androids all over the place. Dana has the guns hidden under the mosaics in the kitchen, I'm heading that way now. Hope this email gets through, haven't used the shortwave for awhile and the power is low.

ADDENDM: Well, this message didn't go through the first time because I forgot the way packet radio routes itself back on Earth and totally botched that one -- luckily still have the message in RAM. Since I wrote the first part of this I've made it back home, Dana has the guns ready in case clark decides to attack, but she's not too happy about the kitchen. She also said she picked up Bill transmitting on the public band, said he was weeping uncontrollably and yelling about "Lizard Nazis" and drooling or something. She said she also heard something on the radio about dicktice running around with a flame thrower, determined to avenge the honor of overweight women from disparaging comments made about their bottoms by BGD.

The second RFID chip is working again, and get this, it went first to Cobra's homestead, and now its trailing Cindy! That one's got to be clark -- he's become unglued. I'd tell Cindy but she only answered me on the radio long enough to say clark was fine and trying to help the United Nations -- has she lost it too? Then her husband got on the radio and said to leave his wife alone or he would tear my pointy ears off. Has everyone on Mars gone looney?

I've got to get ahold of Cobra somehow, he's the only one out here who's still sane.

cmd: D
***DISCONNECTED

CQ: M1ME bunker one to M7CV bunker two . . .
CQ: M1ME bunker one to M7CV bunker two, come in bunker two . . .

Trebuchet · 2004-05-27 22:16:25

What the? When did I get dragged into this?

Journal entry. Date uncertain, as usual. I'm not sure what day it is. Very happy that my home away from dome was nearly finished in the hills outside of town. It's hidden in a crater outside of town where these crazies won't bother me.

I gave the catapult I built as a lark to Mundaka. Can't carry it to the new hab anyways. I plan on defending my hab with alcohol and LOX potato guns of doom. There are plenty of potatos growing in my greenhouse to make the alcohol and serve as ammunition. Any day they don't attack I can bake them in the crude solar furnace I built or drink the raw, burning vodka made by my still.

I have heard the UN has landed. I would be concerned. But it is the UN.

Some strange man is up on the other side of the hill. He wired up a connection to one of the solar panels I had not installed yet and seems to have some sort of sniper setup. Perhaps I can buy him off with vodka if he notices me.

Rxke · 2004-05-27 22:42:41

Journal entry: day of the lizard

With all the passing out, I've lost track of what's happening.
I don't care anymore anyway.
Yesterday, i was walking around, and saw a bunch of rabbits, got one with my little catapult, the others fled. When I reached the rabbit, turns out they were feeding on a dead man's body, ugh!
In my den, i prepared the rabbit, and noticed it had fangs! These critters are mutating like hell...
I've taken to living at night, less radiation that way, i got burned charcoal black during the day, so better be careful.
At night i find my way in the darkness by orientating myself on the glowing patches of blood C.C. leaves everywhere he goes...
Something weird: while preparing the fanged rabbit, i nodded off or a while, and fell into my knife. Not much harm done, i only lost three fingers, but i was startled to see my blood has unmistakenly turned greenish... Probably from the GM stuff i tried to eat, when going through our biolabs... Good thing i threw up the vitamins, never could stand healthfood before, never will, it seems...
Some hours later, i noticed my fingers seem to be growing back. Neat... Muahahaha! Beware of the Lizard King!
*faints*

Trebuchet · 2004-05-27 23:04:42

Journal - same unknown day, extra entry

Have heard raving about lizards on comms. New one for me. I've heard CC babbling about rabbits before.

Mystery sniper is hiding under sandbags now. Neat little spiderhole he built himself. I fear the sun. I think there must be some sort of solar flare. Or perhaps someone cracked open a reactor. My geiger counter is going nuts. I have taken to hiding in the brick vaults under my hab in the fridge I built in the permafrost, kept alive only by the warmth of my suit. When night falls I will pile more sand on top of my hab. Perhaps I should bury the tunnel to my greenhouse. Paranoia is setting in.

I have plenty of booze though.

Cobra Commander · 2004-05-28 07:41:03

Yu Knights everywhere. They keep wanting to 'talk.' So far I've been able to shoot or bribe them without difficulty. Found a funny chip in some of the supplies, suspect it was planted by the robot/rabbit Axis to track me. I put it on Cindy's rover when I ran across her in the desert. She'll be fine, robots are deathly afraid of lovebeads.
Went up to the surface to get bearings, some sniper took a shot at me. He was pretty far away, don't know what that was about. Heading towards old settlement, which is now full of Yu Knights and foreigners in grey suits.
Ohh! I figured out what those rods were for. Needed more plumbing supplies, fortunately there is a large stash in the tunnels. On related note, I need to make some Lithium bullets. Warming fire of salvation is almost ready, must not let Yu Knights find it. To that end, have thrown extra rod over the hermit's perimeter.
Jebus has forsaken me. Periodically his voice comes down from on high with advice like "Use force" but that's it. He doesn't answer my questions anymore. Like why my leg and hands are changing colors and going numb, or how I can puke up rabbit when I haven't eaten a rabbit for days. Miss the fortress, should go back there after saving planet.
Been thinking, realized not enough women on colony ship. Perhaps a factor in recent unrest, driving others to madness. I blame clark.
Must search for remaining parts of salvation machine, expect trouble. Also, should find working radio to determine number and identity of survivors. Jebus needs to know how many chariots to bring.

Palomar · 2004-05-28 07:52:55

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Cindy, meanwhile lit out for hermit country with all the medical supplies and veggies (fortunately the ones I *don't* like, except for the onions -- why did she have to take them ALL? .
cmd: D
***DISCONNECTED

CQ: M1ME bunker one to M7CV bunker two . . .
CQ: M1ME bunker one to M7CV bunker two, come in bunker two . . .

{From somewhere (wouldn't you like to know) on the Marsian high desert, United Federation of Planets Territory}

Calling M1ME bunker one -- Mundaka, I didn't take all the medical supplies. Make sure Rik puts some antiseptic on his cuts from the glass explosion or whatever happened when he yelled too loudly into the microphone.

As for food, I've only taken the dried stuff and pods my husband and I own. Good luck fighting off those clowns from the UN!

Wooooo! Here comes a whopper of a big frickin' dust devil! Damn, it's got to be at least 4-1/2 miles tall and wide as 2 football stadiums. Yeee-haaaaw!

Ian Flint · 2004-05-28 08:49:00

Journal entry: Day... who cares...

I slipped away from the UN forces in the confusion that set in when C.C. came over the horizon carrying those fuel rods. I didn't get here the way I had envisioned, but at least I'm here. I had to get in with the UN force. It was pretty easy since nobody wanted to go get those crazy Martians. All I had to do was volunteer. I can't believe the UN only armed us with tranquilizer guns.

My rover is packed with 6 months of supplies and while in orbit I mapped all the possible locations of supply caches, so I should be OK for about a Martian year.

My first order of business is to camoflage my rover. I will then try to find Cindy, the most sane sounding person in the bunch.

Oh, no!! Something just exploded behind me. Seeking cover...

Cobra Commander · 2004-05-28 13:07:08

Attempted to release fires of salvation, seem to have miscalculated. Debris everywhere, all the rabbits are dead. There's a yellow box with a needle that keeps clicking at me. Ignoring it. Have enough for another attempt, will try to melt rods down into spheres, Jebus tells me it's important.
Yu Knights have since moved into area with more of those clicking boxes. Have decided to flee as food is insufficient to support another surrender.
Received transmission, think it was Mundaka trying to make contact. Lost signal, interference. Cursed the robots to eternal damnation.
Must prepare new salvation machine with revisions. The Second Bombing draws near, must get to work. Yu Knights seem distracted by fuel rod I left at the hermit's camp, bickering. Something about a 'man-date.' Suspect they too brought too few women.
Standby, watching a Yu Knight attempting to conceal his rover. Should shoot him, but am beginning to feel sorry for them. Suppose not, important work to do. Also, blood-ice is poking into leg again, should fix that. Can't lead heathens to promised land with a limp.

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